‘You Feel Like You Failed Your Child’: Parental Experiences of Autism Diagnostic Report Language

This publication is included in the Autistic Autism Scholarship Project. one author of this publication is identified as autistic in the project.

About the autistic author marker

Kerr, S., Robertson, A., Davies, J., & Lang, J. (2026). ‘You Feel Like You Failed Your Child’: Parental Experiences of Autism Diagnostic Report Language. Neurodiversity, 4. https://doi.org/10.1177/27546330261483779

Publication date: 1 Sep 2026 Added to AutiHub: 18 Sep 2026 Type: Article Article language: English

This publication is integrated into AutiHub through:

Authors

Publication authors
4
Publication authors identified as autistic
1 / 4 (25.0%)

Abstract

This study explored parents’ perceptions of the language used in neurodevelopmental diagnostic reports following autism assessments. The research examined how deficit-based language within traditional diagnostic frameworks influence families’ experiences, understanding and engagement with their child's diagnosis. Fifteen parents of autistic children participated in semi-structured interviews, analysed through reflexive thematic analysis. Four themes were identified: deficit framing as misrepresentation of the child, the value of words, reframing diagnosis through neuro-affirming language and affirmation versus access. Parents reported that language in reports was discouraging, overly focused on deficits and at times misrepresented their child's strengths and identity. Neurodivergent participants expressed sensitivity to deficit-based terminology. While many valued more affirming, strengths-based language, some recognised that deficit-oriented language remains necessary to secure support from education and health services. This reveals a complex paradox: language that may grant access to help can simultaneously undermine identity and well-being. The findings indicate that diagnostic language has emotional and relational impact on families and may shape children's self-identity. While changing language alone cannot resolve systemic challenges, adopting more neuro-affirming practices could improve diagnostic experiences and support positive identity development. The study underscores the need for cultural and institutional change to support meaningful, inclusive diagnostic practices reflecting the values of the neurodiversity movement.

Bibliography cited by this reference

Cited references are imported from external metadata sources when they are available. The list may be partial.

Cited bibliography overview

These indicators describe the bibliography cited by this publication. An author name is counted each time it appears in one cited reference, so the same person can be counted more than once. Names not yet linked to an author already present in AutiHub are treated as unknown, not as non-autistic. Last computed: 19 Sep 2026 07:57.

Cited references
82
With a DOI
69
Without a DOI, from raw bibliography text
13
19 / 82 (23.2%) cited references include at least one author identified as autistic.
References with data to complete
4 / 82 (4.9%)
References with detected author names
78 / 82 (95.1%)
Without detected author names
4
Without a structured title
3
Without a stable identifier
13
References with raw author names still to review
4
References with external metadata lookup issues
1
These indicators apply to cited references displayed on this page, after technical duplicates have been merged. A reference without a DOI can still support author statistics when a title and author names are available.
Author names detected in the cited bibliography
208
From DOI or external metadata
208
From validated raw bibliography text
0
Raw names already validated
0
Raw names still to review
4
96 / 208 (46.2%) names are linked to an author already present in AutiHub. 112 / 208 (53.8%) names are not yet linked.
Names linked to a person identified as autistic
25 / 208 (12.0%)
Calculated across all author names detected in the cited bibliography. Among names linked to an author already present in AutiHub: 25 / 96 (26.0%). Distinct people identified as autistic: 16 / 187 (8.6%).
  1. Mitzi M. Waltz (2015). Mothers and Autism: The Evolution of a Discourse of Blame . AMA Journal of Ethics, 17(4), 353-358. American Medical Association (AMA).
    Crossref OpenAlex
  2. Mandy Abbott , Paul Bernard , Jenny Forge (2013). Communicating a diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder - a qualitative study of parents’ experiences . Clinical Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 18(3), 370-382. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  3. Joanna Murray (2010). Qualitative Research Methods . In Principles of Social Psychiatry (pp. 77-87). Wiley.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  4. González Moreno, Andrés Santiago (2013). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders . American Psychiatric Association.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  5. Janice Mulligan , Radha MacCulloch , Bethany Good , David Nicholas (2012). Transparency, Hope, and Empowerment: A Model for Partnering With Parents of a Child With Autism Spectrum Disorder at Diagnosis and Beyond . Social Work in Mental Health, 10(4), 311-330. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  6. Emily Anderberg , Mikle South (2021). Predicting Parent Reactions at Diagnostic Disclosure Sessions for Autism . Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 51(10), 3533-3546. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  7. Anderson-Chavarria M. (2021). The autism predicament: Models of autism and their impact on autistic identity . Disability & Society, 37(8), 1.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  8. Sara Goering (2015). Rethinking disability: the social model of disability and chronic disease . Current Reviews in Musculoskeletal Medicine, 8(2), 134-138. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  9. Gray Atherton , Yuko Morimoto , Satoshi Nakashima , Liam Cross (2023). Does the Study of Culture Enrich Our Understanding of Autism? A Cross-Cultural Exploration of Life on the Spectrum in Japan and the West . Journal of Cross-Cultural Psychology, 54(5), 610-634. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  10. Pier Jaarsma , Stellan Welin (2012). Autism as a Natural Human Variation: Reflections on the Claims of the Neurodiversity Movement . Health Care Analysis, 20(1), 20-30. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  11. Timothy J Beck (2024). Neurodivergent culture and embodied knowledge beyond neoliberal identity politics . Culture & Psychology, 30(3), 736-756. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  12. Sheila Riddell , Elisabet Weedon (2009). Approaches to dispute resolution in additional support needs in Scotland . European Journal of Special Needs Education, 24(4), 355-369. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  13. Becker R. (2022). Gender and survey participation: An event history analysis of the gender effects of survey participation in a probability-based multi-wave panel study with a sequential mixed-mode design . Methods, Data, Analyses, 16(1), 3.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  14. Mike Oliver (2013). The social model of disability: thirty years on . Disability & Society, 28(7), 1024-1026. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  15. Lauren D. Berkovits , Christine T. Moody , Jan Blacher (2020). “I don’t feel different. But then again, I wouldn’t know what it feels like to be normal”: Perspectives of Adolescents with Autism Spectrum Disorder . Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 50(3), 831-843. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  16. Sheila Riddell (2009). Social justice, equality and inclusion in Scottish education . Discourse: Studies in the Cultural Politics of Education, 30(3), 283-296. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  17. Monique Botha *Autistic author. Learn more… (2020). Autism is me”: An investigation of how autistic individuals make sense of autism and stigma . Disability & Society, 37(3), 1.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  18. Lorcan Kenny , Caroline Hattersley , Bonnie Molins , Carole Buckley , Carol Povey , Elizabeth Pellicano (2016). Which terms should be used to describe autism? Perspectives from the UK autism community . Autism, 20(4), 442-462. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  19. Bransgrove K. (2025). Being Autistic is Kind of Who You Are, It’s an Identity Rather than a Disorder”: Identity Negotiation and Construction Among Autistic Adults Diagnosed in Later Life . Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  20. Angela Sweeney , Sarah Clement , Beth Filson , Angela Kennedy (2016). Trauma-informed mental healthcare in the UK: what is it and how can we further its development? Mental Health Review Journal, 21(3), 174-192. Emerald.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  21. Virginia Braun , Victoria Clarke (2019). Reflecting on reflexive thematic analysis . Qualitative Research in Sport, Exercise and Health, 11(4), 589-597. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  22. Kate Cooper , Laura G. E. Smith , A. Russell (2017). Social identity, self‐esteem, and mental health in autism . European Journal of Social Psychology, 47(7), 844-854. Wiley.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  23. Virginia Braun , Victoria Clarke (2021). Can I use TA? Should I use TA? Should I not use TA? Comparing reflexive thematic analysis and other pattern‐based qualitative analytic approaches . Counselling and Psychotherapy Research, 21(1), 37-47. Wiley.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  24. (2021). Code of Ethics and Conduct . British Psychological Society.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  25. Riley Buijsman , Sander Begeer , Anke Scheeren (2023). ‘Autistic person’ or ‘person with autism’? Person-first language preference in Dutch adults with autism and parents . Autism, 27(3), 788-795. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  26. Hannah Legg , Anna Tickle (2019). UK parents’ experiences of their child receiving a diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder: A systematic review of the qualitative evidence . Autism, 23(8), 1897-1910. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  27. Bury S. M. (2020). It Defines Who I Am” or “It’s Something I Have”: What Language Do [Autistic] . Australian Adults [on the Autism Spectrum] Prefer?. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 53(2), 677.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  28. Robert Chapman *Autistic author. Learn more… (2021). Neurodiversity and the Social Ecology of Mental Functions . Perspectives on Psychological Science, 16(6), 1360-1372. SAGE Publications.
  29. Laura Jackson , Saskia Keville , Amanda K. Ludlow (2020). Mothers’ Experiences of Accessing Mental Health Care for their Child with an Autism Spectrum Disorder . Journal of Child and Family Studies, 29(2), 534-545. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  30. Lynn Clouder , Mehmet Karakus , Alessia Cinotti , María Virginia Ferreyra , Genoveva Amador Fierros , Patricia Rojo (2020). Neurodiversity in higher education: a narrative synthesis . Higher Education, 80(4), 757-778. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  31. Megan L. E. Clark , Dawn Adams (2020). Parent-Reported Barriers and Enablers of Strengths in their Children with Autism . Journal of Child and Family Studies, 29(9), 2402-2415. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  32. Cleary M. (2022). From “refrigerator mothers” to empowered advocates: The evolution of the autism parent . Issues in Mental Health Nursing, 44, 1.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  33. Damian Milton *Autistic author. Learn more… , Krysia Emily Waldock *Autistic author. Learn more… , Nathan Keates (2023). Autism and the ‘double empathy problem’ . In Conversations on empathy: Interdisciplinary perspectives on empathy, imagination and othering (pp. 78-97). Routledge.
    Type: Book chapter DOI: 10.4324/9781003189978-6 OpenAlex: https://openalex.org/W3092319393
  34. Laura Crane , James W Chester , Lorna Goddard , Lucy A Henry , Elisabeth L. Hill (2016). Experiences of autism diagnosis: A survey of over 1000 parents in the United Kingdom . Autism, 20(2), 153-162. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref
  35. Laura Crane , Lok Man Lui , Jade Davies , Elizabeth Pellicano (2021). Autistic parents’ views and experiences of talking about autism with their autistic children . Autism, 25(4), 1161-1167. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  36. Lynnea Myers , Sharon M. Karp , Mary S. Dietrich , Wendy S. Looman , Melanie Lutenbacher (2021). Family-Centered Care: How Close Do We Get When Talking to Parents of Children Undergoing Diagnosis for Autism Spectrum Disorders? Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 51(9), 3073-3084. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  37. Adam W. McCrimmon , Shawna M. Gray (2021). A Systematic Review of Factors Relating to Parental Satisfaction with the Diagnostic Process for Autism Spectrum Disorder . Review Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 8(3), 334-349. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  38. Maria Efstratopoulou , Maria Sofologi , Sofia Giannoglou , Eleni Bonti (2022). Parental Stress and Children’s Self-Regulation Problems in Families with Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) . Journal of Intelligence, 10(1), 4. MDPI AG.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  39. Jaime Flowers , Jillian Dawes , Daniel McCleary , Hunter Marzolf (2023). Words matter: Language preferences in a sample of autistic adults . Neurodiversity, 1. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  40. Shelby Forbes (2023). The Discursive Organization of Disability as a Moral and Epistemic Construct within a University Accommodations Office . Journal of Disability Studies in Education, 4(1), 50-74. Walter de Gruyter GmbH.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  41. Miranda Fricker (2007). Testimonial Injustice . In Epistemic Injustice (pp. 9-29). Oxford University PressOxford.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  42. Amber Makino , Laura Hartman , Gillian King , Pui Ying Wong , Melanie Penner (2021). Parent Experiences of Autism Spectrum Disorder Diagnosis: a Scoping Review . Review Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 8(3), 267-284. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  43. Philippine Geelhand , Fanny Papastamou , Marie Belenger , Élise Clin , Lydia Hickman , Connor Tom Keating et al. (2023). Autism-Related Language Preferences of French-Speaking Autistic Adults: An Online Survey . Autism in Adulthood, 5(3), 275-288. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  44. Dan Goodley (2014). Dis/ability Studies . Routledge.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  45. Lisa B. Grech , Donna Koller , Amanda Olley (2023). Furthering the person-first versus identity-first language debate . Australian Psychologist, 58(4), 223-232. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  46. Halder S. (2022). Understanding strengths and challenges of people with autism: Insights from parents and practitioners . International Journal of Developmental Disabilities, 70(1), 1.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  47. Hamilton L. (2019). Disability as a social construction: Investigating how autism is represented in the mainstream media . PRISM: Casting New Light on Learning, Theory and Practice, 2(2), 20.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  48. Moti Zwilling , Beni Levy (2022). How Well Environmental Design Is and Can Be Suited to People with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD): A Natural Language Processing Analysis . International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 19(9), 5037. MDPI AG.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  49. Laurence Hasson , Saskia Keville , Jen Gallagher , Dami Onagbesan , Amanda K. Ludlow (2024). Inclusivity in education for autism spectrum disorders: Experiences of support from the perspective of parent/carers, school teaching staff and young people on the autism spectrum . International Journal of Developmental Disabilities, 70(2), 201-212. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  50. Jaci C. Huws , Robert S. P. Jones (2011). Missing voices: representations of autism in British newspapers, 1999–2008 . British Journal of Learning Disabilities, 39(2), 98-104. Wiley.
    Crossref
  51. Sally Nathan , Christy Newman , Kari Lancaster (2019). Qualitative Interviewing . In Handbook of Research Methods in Health Social Sciences (pp. 391-410). Springer Singapore.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  52. Amy K. Izuno-Garcia , Morgan M. McNeel , Rachel H. Fein (2023). Neurodiversity in Promoting the Well-Being of Children on the Autism Spectrum . Child Care in Practice, 29(1), 54-67. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  53. Elizabeth M. Radulski (2022). Conceptualising Autistic Masking, Camouflaging, and Neurotypical Privilege: Towards a Minority Group Model of Neurodiversity . Human Development, 66(2), 113-127. S. Karger AG.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  54. Elinda Ai Lim Lee , Melissa Scott , Melissa H. Black , Emily D’Arcy , Tele Tan , Louise Sheehy et al. (2024). “He Sees his Autism as a Strength, Not a Deficit Now”: A Repeated Cross-Sectional Study Investigating the Impact of Strengths-Based Programs on Autistic Adolescents . Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 54(5), 1656-1671. Springer Science and Business Media LLC.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  55. Kevin Proudfoot (2023). Inductive/Deductive Hybrid Thematic Analysis in Mixed Methods Research . Journal of Mixed Methods Research, 17(3), 308-326. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  56. Alexander C Wilson , Stef Gunn (2023). What parents want in an autism diagnostic report: An interview-based study of parents accessing a neurodevelopmental assessment service . Clinical Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 28(3), 937-951. SAGE Publications.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  57. Donald Maciver , Marion Rutherford , Lorna Johnston , Anusua Singh Roy (2023). Prevalence of neurodevelopmental differences and autism in Scottish primary schools 2018–2022 . Autism Research, 16(12), 2403-2414. Wiley.
    Type: Article DOI: 10.1002/aur.3063 OpenAlex: https://openalex.org/W4389038295
    Crossref
  58. McGrath R. (2021). Journalling and memoing: Reflexive qualitative research tools . Handbook of qualitative research methodologies in workplace contexts, 245.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  59. Rosemarie B. Wilson , Andrew R. Thompson , Georgina Rowse , Megan Freeth (2023). The experience of seeking, receiving, and reflecting upon a diagnosis of autism in the UK: A meta-synthesis of qualitative studies conducted with autistic individuals . Research in Autism Spectrum Disorders, 103, 102135. Elsevier BV.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  60. Mogensen L. L. (2015). The meaning of a label for teenagers negotiating identity: experiences with autism spectrum disorder . The meaning of a label for teenagers negotiating identity: experiences with autism spectrum disorder.
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  61. National Institute for Health and Care Excellence. (2011). Autism spectrum disorder in under 19s: recognition referral and diagnosis (NICE Guideline No. 128). NICE. https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg128/chapter/Recommendations#autism-diagnostic-assessment-for-children-and-young-people .
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  62. David Thacher (2024). Policing a neurodiverse world: Lessons from the social model of disability . Policing: A Journal of Policy and Practice, 18. Oxford University Press (OUP).
    Crossref OpenAlex
  63. Alexandra-Maria Strunel , Sebastian Cordoba (2025). Insider/outsider dynamics: a reflexive thematic analysis of reflexivity/positionality in the ‘qualitative research in psychology’ journal . Qualitative Research in Psychology, 22(4), 887-917. Informa UK Limited.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  64. MacKenzie Smith , RaMonda Horton , Meredith Fitzgibbons (2023). Preferences for Person-First Language and Identity-First Language in Autistic Communities . Journal of Critical Study of Communication and Disability, 1(2). The Ohio State University Libraries.
    Crossref OpenAlex
  65. Scottish Intercollegiate Guidelines Network. (2016). Assessment diagnosis and interventions for autism spectrum disorders. (SIGN Publication No. 145). SIGN. https://www.sign.ac.uk/assets/sign145.pdf .
    Type: Other
    Crossref
  66. World Health Organisation. (2019). International Classification of Diseases 11th Revision (ICD-11). https://icd.who.int/en .
    Type: Other
    Crossref